My Conscious Journey

Man, have I tried to write something here on this blog for a while without much success? Every time I sat down to write my thoughts went into either mush or into a inferno and I almost fell off my chair of exhaustion. I guess you could say that I was OD’ing on life for a moment and didn’t know what or how to say it. To be honest, I still don’t, but at least now I actually managed to log in. That’s always a start. So Hi! Here I am. Back again and trying to catch up a bit.

While March for me was such a great month of beautiful development, creativity, love and fun April came and bitch slapped me around a bit. Damn! I was humbled by the universe yet again and learned a few things here and there. One thing in particular that I would like to share;

The first or the second time you meet with somebody new, be it business or romantically, he or she will tell you who they are if you listen and you will have all your information you need right there and then. Key word here is ‘listen’. I find so many times, that people, yours truly as well, talk to them selves to be listened to without really listening to what is going on the room. Talk is silver and silence is gold. Cliche, but still good and goes a long way.

You probably know the feeling when you fall in love with somebody, or you get super excited by the work relationship you envision you could have together with this amazing human being you just met. Well, often times this is usually only the idea of somebody. A potential you see in this special somebody you want to do business with or perhaps even date. This excitement over shines all intuition and we totally neglect to actually listen to whats going on.

Since I began my 90 days of Conscious Living with my shaman friend Lasse Larsen I am trying to listen more on all levels. To observe and to take a step back every time I feel overwhelmed, angry or negative. I realize, that sometimes it is a better action to not take action right away. Or at all. To ask instead of giving your opinion in a situation and hear what the other party wants. It might seem a little abstract, so I’ll give an example without being too specific. I don’t want to name drop.

Have you ever been in a business meeting where you felt everything went wrong? I have, and previously I watched myself trying to overcompensate and ‘fix’ the situation so the meeting would get back on track and go the way I had planned or wished for. It felt horrible and often times I failed bitterly in my attempt. Lately, for some reason I have begun to take a completely different approach. When I have no clue what the hell is going on in a meeting I’m in, I take the back seat, listen and once the other person/persons are done I ask them what I can help them with or do for them. Usually the answer is very clear and I know instantly if I will be working with them or not. Either way is fine. Because things are exactly how they are supposed to be. Even when it’s tough. It’s so simple. At least it can be if we allow it.

So why and where did it change for me? Through my process with being more conscious of everything around me it dawned on me that I am absolutely irrelevant. My body is just a container and it’s all ego. So is the mind and it’s strong believes in X, Y and Z. The physical body that I call ‘me’, Kristina, is not important. The idea is. The idea is way bigger than me. It becomes a purpose that I for some reason is here to follow through.

The movie Daughter Cell, that I am working on right now has become a very personal project to me. It was not so much in the beginning. It was a movie about amazing science and technology of the future. As I got back from filming THE TEAM in Europe I realized that my movie is really my journey to try to reconnect with my scientist father who happens to be famous for creating artificial life. As I realized this, a bunch of new people came into my life and the movie exploded and got bigger. My ego came into play a few times, but with help, I understood and practiced to step back and invite other people and talents in and help me follow my path and purpose. Sometimes, actually a lot of times we need to ask for help before we can give back. I’m not good at asking. I’m work in progress 😉

Meantime I started talking a lot with Lasse and he agreed to take me on his Conscious Living journey even though he had to go out of town for a month with The Caravan of Change to help people with nutrition, health and consciousness in different towns out South East. Everything pretty much happened at the same time and it is like riding a tornado.

In the process I passed on a movie that was supposed to shoot in Arkansas right now. It sucks because I love losing myself in a new character and this movie would have given me that opportunity. But Daughter Cell is more important right now and so is this crazy journey that I am on.

Hope I didn’t lose you on the way here. Sorry if it got too abstract. Please ask me if you have questions. I don’t mind sharing.

The pics are a tiny glimpse of what’s been going on lately. Please read captions to understand…

Have a beautiful weekend!

xx KK

Desktop22  Signing contracts with new producer David Foox @ Soho House West LA and one morning of filming via skype with Las Vegas, LA and Copenhagen. Hi future! Desktop20The director of The Stunt Comedy TV Show, Deni Jordan, asked me to represent the show @ The LA Independent Film Festival where we were nominated. My biz partner and good friend Alexis Baker came with me.

Desktop18Behind the scenes from a shoot I did in Silverlake with Photographer: Marco Ponti, MUA: Phoebe Dawson and Stylist: Lehang Pedersen @Love me Twice. Such a fun day under the sun 🙂

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Stylist Lehang and I taking a champagne break in the shade from shooting. Selfie with Phoebe Dawson’s amazing make up. I adore her!

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Yes, and then I did some ADR (sound) for two projects; the upper was for the first episode of THE TEAM. They rented a sound stage here in LA for me and another actor to come in and do the post sound. It was awesome to be on the phone with director Kathrine Windfeld and to get to relive the scenes again we shot way back in October 2013. The lower image is from a movie I shot here in LA in November. Same thing and a completely different character. So fun!

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Discussion about this post

  1. Juani Guerra says:

    Try to change the I into a she. Narrating your life from outside is always more intense as Modernist writers proved. Grammar is another artífice that can modify the receptiom of a life /consciousness. Maybe you should read Joyce’s Ulysses right now for, as with the story you tell of your father, in a journey of consciousness, its not the pastness of the past but its present. Enjoy it

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